So being the curious man I am, I was just reading a few articles online that attempted to give us men an idea of what the ladies would like us, men, to wear.
Why? To be honest, I am not sure, but I do wish I hadn’t. Well, I guess it wasn’t that bad since it gave me the idea to come up with this post. That’s me thinking positive.
I suppose I could say my instinct told me it would be interesting to know what really goes on inside the mind of women who actually care about the way men dress. If anything, just because of the nature of this blog I feel it’s my responsibility to stay informed.
Some of these articles I read ran surveys with their female readers, while others opted to ask famous women from the fashion or entertainment industries for their opinions on what men should wear (or should not wear) if what they want is to capture the ladies’ attention.
After spending a while reading these articles, and then some more making sense of all the stuff I had read, I came to a very simple conclusion:
It’s all BS.
Here’s what I found.
This Is What Women Would Love To See You Wear
Let’s start by listing what some of the answers that some ladies gave. Remember, these should be some clues for you to know how they would like to see you dressed if you want them to notice you:
- Rugged jeans and a plain white t-shirt.
- Fitted suits or tuxedos.
- Jeans and white shirt.
- Baseball t-shirts.
- Long johns.
- Cashmere sweaters.
So, as you can see, there is a really wide spectrum that goes from very casual to the most elegant of outfits. And to be fair, most of their personal preferences are completely acceptable.
Well, except long johns. Did one girl really said long johns?
Anyway, I wonder… What’s the key takeaway from these answers? In reality, the answer seems to be… well… none. If anything, now you know that certain women like certain stuff on men, while some others like some other different stuff. That’s pretty much it.
This leaves us without any valuable insight to make an informed decision next time we’re choosing what to wear.
Ok, moving on…
The Kind Of Clothes The Women Don’t Like On Us
When it comes to the type of clothes that the ladies don’t like on men, it’s just as difficult as it is confusing. Their opinions are all over the board.
Some women detest men who wear high-rise trousers. while others can’t stand a man in baggy pants. Some ladies hate sneakers, while some others seem to be allergic to overdressed men.
Again, it’s quite clear: every woman has her own predilections, so achieving any type of concensus might be impossible.
Which brings me to…
Stop Wasting Your Time Dressing To Please Anyone Else. Yes, Even The Ladies.
That’s right. It is just not worth your time, stress or effort to try to come up with a style that will please someone else.
“Oh, but Ed, I want to get me a hot lady, you know…”
I’m sorry, man – not gonna happen. At least not only by dressing the way they would like you to dress.
Let’s just consider the variables.
I mean, each of these girls knows what their ideal man should look like and how he should dress. But then again, each of these imaginary perfect men are perfect only for a single, very specific woman.
And now you have to deal with the fact that the next woman’s ideal man could very likely be the complete opposite of what the first woman believes to be ideal.
Should you ever get interested in a new girl, would you completely redo your style to fit what she expects of you and repeat this pattern again and again and again until you find the right girl? That’d be pretty stupid, wouldn’t it? Don’t fall into that trap!
And last, but not least. Who says she finds you attractive anyway? If she’s not into you, clothes won’t change that. So why should you even care?
To me, it all sounds like a perfect recipe for failed, irrational attempts at impressing someone else.
What’s the phrase? Oh yes, you can’t please everyone all of the time.
But you can please yourself. Yes, I know how that sounded. 🙂
Related reading: How To Make Kick Ass First Impressions
Why Simply Dressing For Yourself Makes Much More Sense
You know, as selfish as it sounds, sometimes you just gotta be yourself and do whatever makes you happy.
Sure, always strive to improve the way you present yourself. I would be utterly stupid and inconsistent to advice against working on building a better self image (considering the type of blog My Dapper Self is).
But this quest for improvement in your appearance should exclusively be based on your own personal goals and at no time should other people’s expectations of how you should look play any role in your journey.
It is simple, just aim to reach your style goals as means to get yourself prepared for the great achievements that will come along.
Craft a style that is clearly still you, just a better, enhanced version of yourself.
After all, with your achievements come self-esteem and a huge boost of confidence. And guess what? If there is one single thing all women love, regardless of how men dress, is confidence.
Dress for yourself and you’ll be killing it with the ladies without even consciously trying.